It's been decided. I want to live in an antique mall! I could move from section to section and just be surrounded by beautiful old things. I stopped by one yesterday looking for an old cabinet of sorts for storage in my bathroom. I've been amazed at the prices of furniture these days. I was surprised when I began to see that it is almost cheaper to buy antiques these days. I don't know when that change in trends began. Is it simply that we don't value the old as much as we used to, or an insatiable appetite for the new? But give me a 75 year old bookcase any day as a pressboard kit-in-a-box, assemble yourself one for the same price. Good grief!

Birthdays have a strange effect on me. I either hop out of bed excited about the day or I wake up facing another year and feeling like I didn't accomplish much with the last year...which of course is just lies from the enemy. I'm ashamed to say that I succombed to the latter this year. But several helped turn that around. I had a great walk with the Lord first thing in the morning. I haven't done that for a while, not having a grip on my allergies. I decided my birthday would be a good time to start.

We've had a tradition in the Brandel family for as long as I can remember. Dad always took us out for breakfast on our birthday and had us think through our goals for the coming year. They started with things like: get better on the flute, finish a room in my dollhouse, etc. and evolved to things like memorize the book of James, publish my book. I guess that is why my birthday seems like a "year in review" of sorts. It's a good thing, though, and I really appreciate the motivation to be a goal setter.

So this year as I was on my walk with the Lord, I was remembering that it was exactly two years to the day that I had asked God if I could just meet the owner of the land we lease and God sent him to our door that very day. I was questioning God on my understanding of His ways and His promises. I confessed that one of my biggest fears was that one of the definitions I learned in the past for faith was: Understanding what God intends to do in a given situation, and acting in accordance with it. I confessed my fear that I feel I don't understand or see what God intends to do much of anywhere these days and fear trying to "act in accordance."

When I came home, I opened my e-mail and found this from Purpose Driven Life:

For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay. Habakkuk 2:3 (NIV)

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If you ever find yourself in God’s waiting room – waiting for an answer, a change, or a miracle – you just need to stop and trust God. He’s never late or in a hurry, because his timing is perfect.

Wow! O.K.

I was surprised by several calls from friends. My husband traded his days off, so he could work on the bathroom some more. His goal was that I could shower in the new bathroom this morning. He also watched the boys, so I could just escape for the afternoon. I ran a few errands, antique browsed, and found a nice grassy place to read for a while. It was perfect. Then my three local brothers came over for dinner and cake.

My heart is filling with things to write. It's about time! But unfortunately the kids are rousing and becoming quite chatty - so it will have to wait.