Our Very Own Polar Express

I explained to the boys today that our mini-van was our very own polar express...covered in snow, with formidible tires that will get us anywhere. We treck out into the blizzard, fill it with presents, and come back home. :D

I began my shopping today. I'm almost finished. I have three people to buy for still. God has provided in amazing ways to make this Christmas include gift giving, and it has been fun to just enjoy it. It was a long day, but not overly stressful. I felt behind, but honestly I think I'll do this again. I would rather have one long day than think about shopping for six weeks! It really helps keep my focus on the right thing.

Our women's minister spoke at MOPS this last week and said that some years you have to purpose to not do anything that doesn't help you remember why you're celebrating. I think this is one of those years at our house - and frankly, I'm enjoying it!

...Speaking of our new women's minister...Her name is Santha. She came over to visit with me after the kids were all tucked in. It was comical to begin with. The kids over heard me telling Bill she was coming over and were all in an uproar about Santa coming to their house last night and laughing at Bill for referring to Santa as a "her". We cleared it all up, and then they were practicing her name trying to get the "th" in the right place. It was coming out as "Zantha," "Thantha," and all manner of things. I told her that if she had moved here any month besides December, it would be a whole different story. :D

Anyway...she was a total encouragement to me. I'm just in awe when God puts someone in my life that can just see through and speak truth - speak into me. We talked about my struggle to just be a lover vs. a worker. She asked me what my love language was. Interesting. I know it is quality time, and I do love to spend time with God - but I'm such a trained "doer." She challenged me to stop doing and to love God in my language...to learn to just sit before him and not "do" anything...to read the same passage every night for a week and just ask God to speak. She affirmed over and over that she just saw that God was pruning me, and pruning didn't mean that dead things were being cut off. Pruning means that life-bearing branches, good branches get cut off in order for even better fruit. She told me over and over that she really believed that God had something for me that was beyond my wildest dreams - things I hadn't even dared to dream (which is hard for me to comprehend because I have a pretty wild imagination!), but that this may be simply a season where God teaches me to love Him and not do anything. We talked of my struggle to "get over myself" because I know that that is the hangup. If I was only concerned about God's glory and His purposes, then I wouldn't have anything to worry about. But I'm so worried about my own interest, my own desires - even desires I believe came from Him - but if they are from Him, if it is His plan, He won't let me miss it! I want my timing! But she challenged me that it is pointless to focus on "getting over myself" because that is still focusing on me. My focus needs to be loving God.

I can't tell you how blessed I feel to have such an amazing support system around me. I'm so priveleged to be on a women's ministry team at one of the fastest-growing, cutting edge, churches in the nation...to have the most amazing, God-chasing, Christ-following women who encourage and love without condemnation, but continuously call it like it is and challenge me to not settle for nice, surface answers. It is amazing to have two or three people grab me and hold me and pray with me before I can walk across a room....to have friends call and pray over the phone that they will be strong enough to hold my arms up when I can't hold them up any longer. I am blessed.