Be Pleased, O Lord, to save me!

Many, O Lord my God, are the wonders you have done.
The things you planned
for us no one can recount to you;
were I to speak and tell of them, they
would be too many to declare.
Psalm 40:5

Those who have known us for several years have always looked to Bill and I as some that have great faith. I'd like to believe that too. We've seen God do big things. We've trusted God with some very big things. We've laid lots of things down to step out on faith because we believed God said to.

The last two years have been completely different for us. Again, we laid some things down and stepped out on faith. Things didn't go like we thought they would. There were little fireworks. God didn't provide in the same way He had at times in the past. We have survived, but it has been slow and often torterous. We have been learning new lessons this time around....Can we keep trusting even if we don't see anything happening? Can we keep believing when God seems silent? Can we keep hoping when there seems to be nothing in store for the future? Can we keep following, daily, no matter what? Can we just be normal, ordinary, every day people that have to juggle 3-4 jobs, so they can work their way through stacks of medical bills and wonder what it is all about? Can I keep going when I feel I'm trudging through more consequences than blessings?

I'd be lying if I said I've always kept hoping, always kept believe, always kept trusting, and always felt like trudging on...and honestly, I don't like normal. But normal is where we are. Normally busy and pre-occupied and struggling to get by with our visions of God's plan for us looming so far in the distance, that we often barely recognize it.

God has been so faithful to send certain people and certain messages to us just at the right time, over and over again. This week, someone called him with a message for Bill, "Keep your chins up! I believe God has told me this is your year for fruitfulness." Bill looked like he'd been through the ringer when he came out of the bedroom. He was totally drained and confronted with the choice: Do I believe?

...and I've been confronted ever since. Do I risk letting myself hope again? Can I let myself out of the chains I've attached to my own wrists of surrendering to the mundane without hope of a brighter future?

Last night, I felt impressed to turn to the Psalms. As a kid, we would start on the Psalm for the date and then add 30 and read the next one. So last night, I opened to Psalm 10, then read Psalm 40, looking for some kind of Word from the Lord. I got to verse 11, my heart began to cry out:

Do not withhold your mercy from me, O Lord; may your love and your truth always
protect me. For troubles without number surround me; my sins have overtaken
me, and I cannot see. They are more than the hairs of my head, and my heart
fails within me. (11-12)

When I got to verse 13, God said clearly, "PRAY THIS!"

Be pleased, O Lord, to save me; O Lord, come quickly to help me. May all who seek
to take my life be put to shame and confusion; may all who desire my ruin be
turned back in disgrace. May those who say to me, "Aha! Aha!" be appalled
at their own shame. But may all who seek you rejoice and be glad in you;
may those who love your salvation always say, "The Lord be exalted!" Yet I am
poor and needy; may the Lord think of me. You are my help and my deliverer; O my
God, do not delay. (vs. 13-17)

Yes, Lord! Yes...be pleased to save us! Come help us, quickly!

It was so good and so timely, so I wanted to read more. I turned to Psalm 70, and began to read ....looking for more. What else does God want me to know? to pray?

Guess what Psalm 70 says? The same thing. I'm not kidding. It is the same thing as Psalm 40: 13-17. There is only one phrase different. It is exactly what God wants our prayer to be right now.

So I ended up on my face....a very comforting position that I don't go to near as often as I should. Praying earnestly that God would be pleased to quickly come to save us.

.....and I have more to share - but Letterman is almost on and I want to see Christa! :)